It simultaneously feels like he just arrived, but also that he’s been part of our family forever.
While his birth story is not picture perfect the way I had imagined it would be, it is special because it’s his. Normally I am very open about our lives because there’s beauty in the story. Not to say that his story isn’t beautiful, but I am keeping this one to ourselves. We are both healthy and that is all that matters now.
But his tumultuous and very quick entry into this world did not rob him of his sweetness, and I thank God for that.
People ask us where the inspiration of his name came from. Emerson was the name of the pastor that baptized Caleb and also spoke in our marriage ceremony. He was a very important person to Caleb. Although he is no longer with us, we hope our Emerson exudes that peaceful and sure love that Emerson embodied. Scott, his middle name, is a family name on Caleb’s side. It took us 38 weeks to decide on a boy name, but goodness, it just fits.
Every newborn, every child is different. I have been told this many times, but it didn’t really click until I saw it in my own children. Huxley was, and still is, extremely independent. We joke that she could have raised herself. She slept through the night, rarely cried, and was a light eater. Jackson acted as if he were allergic to sleep; we were zombies for a few months after he was born because he had his days and nights mixed up and we had no idea how to adjust that sleeping pattern. He also ate us out of house and home. My body could not keep up and we transitioned him to formula just two months after he was born.
And then there is Emerson, a beautiful mixture between the two who preceded him. He sleeps well at night, waking usually only once to nurse…but this boy, he did not sleep during the day for the first two months. We think we finally have him figured out, at least for now, so that we can get the stage set just right so that he will nap a couple hours during the day. He also enjoys eating, but I think he mostly just enjoys being near me. He and Jackson are both fond of their momma, and that makes my heart happy.
It has been quite the transition to becoming a family of five. Often times it is pure chaos. From the outside looking in, I am sure it seems like we are herding wild cats…because, well, we kind of are with a 4- and 2-year-old, plus a newborn. If I had a dime every time an elderly person in a store says, “You know what causes that to happen, right?!” I would have at least a dollar.
But in all seriousness, these are a few lessons that I have learned as a parent of a growing family:
- You will either be 30 minutes early or 30 minutes late to everything. You will never be right on time, so just give up that hope now.
- You will feel mom guilt no matter what. Whether you buy them new clothes or let them wear hand-me-downs. Whether you work full-time, part-time, or stay at home with them. Whether you let them watch another movie or you plan a beautiful craft/activity with them. Whether you meal plan or they have peanut butter and jelly for the sixth meal in a row. So just know there are good days when you have all your sh*t together…and there are normal days when it seems like everything is on fire.
- Never will there be a time when everyone has every appropriate article of clothing on. This morning, for example, we got one sock on and he freaked OUT about putting the second one. So you know what? He had one on for the whole day…and he survived.
- TikTok parenting hacks work like 1% of the time.
- Less is more. Kids barely need anything except food and clothes. Toys are great, but they’re fleeting. Send those babies outside and let them explore.
- If you cannot figure out what’s wrong with your child, either take them outside or give them a bath. Fresh air and water can fix a lot of things.
- Everything is only a season. Potty training is a season. Teething is a season. Newborn sleepless nights…a season. It might feel like Game of Thrones when they say “Winter is coming” for like four seasons…but trust me, it is still just a season. And I know I can make it through the season, sometimes even optimistically!
- Ask for help.
- Toddlers are mirrors. They will reflect your best and worst traits. When you scream, they scream. When you smile, they smile. I try to remember this whenever I am disciplining, whenever I am teaching a life lesson, whenever we are in the store or the gas station…those guys are the most observant little snipers you’ll ever meet.
- Let go of perfection. It’s okay to love your tiny, mess space that’s not always perfectly reset in the morning. Your house looks like kids live there because they do.
Emerson Scott, you are the most perfect addition to our family. I thank God for you, your siblings, and the differences within each of you that teach me to be a better mother and example.
[…] story to ourselves, if you want to read more about our adjustment to being a family of five, read this blog post dedicated to […]
1 Comment on Introducing: Emerson Scott Haney